In the meantime, today I wanted to bring you the Dos and Don'ts of Dating, as stipulated to Gill, the main character, by Happy Ever After Dating Agency.
Gill's had a pretty crappy dating history (who hasn't at some point?) After failing to find a suitable mate the traditional way, having endured yet another blind date at the hands of her friends, she's had enough and joins Happy Ever After - the dating agency for professional people.
Today I'd like to invite you to leave a comment on the blog, with your blind date/internet date or dating agency best or worst experience. But keep it clean and relatively concise!
I'll start you off. I have had 2 blind dates in my life. I'm not sure who was the most blind, me or them!
Bizarrely, both were farmers! And no, I don't have a thing for men of the earth! I hasten to add that in both cases, this was about 13 years ago.
The first one was handsome, Scottish, but for some reason had it in his head that I would look like Rachel from S Club 7...
I also think he was looking for a wife. NOOO! The farmer wants a wife...it made me think of this playground song -
The farmer's in his den
The farmer's in his den
Eee eye addy-oh
The farmer's in his den
The farmer wants a wife
The farmer wants a wife
Eee eye addy-oh
The farmer wants a wife
The wife wants a child...
The child wants a dog...
The dog wants a bone... You get the picture!!
So that one didn't work out and neither did the second one. On visiting friends in Dublin, I agreed to go on a blind date with this bloke, another farmer! Well, he was Irish, and I am a complete sucker for the accent!
Has anyone ever gone on an excruciating date? One where you know right from the start it's not going anywhere and it's painful to actually BE there?! This was it. The guy was kinda geeky, but trying too hard not to be, and just came off as a bit insane!
When he went to the toilet, four guys at the next table said to me, 'Ditch him, come out with us. He's obviously not your type.'
But, I am too nice to do that, so I thanked them and endured the date for the minimum amount of time which politeness allowed. But, oh what a pity, as those four guys were pretty hot! Damn!
Anyway, fortunately 11 years ago I met my Other Half and we're stuck with each other now!
To find out how Gill fares in The Dating Game, you only have to wait until next Fri, 2nd Nov.
For now, I'd love if you could leave your comments and give us all a good laugh. Please note you can't have known your date before going on the date!
And finally here are Happy Ever After's Dos and Don'ts of Dating
DOs
Meet in a neutral place. Under no circumstances invite your date to
pick you up from your home
Wear smart, but casual clothing
Be positive and friendly
Listen to your date and allow them
the opportunity to talk
Exchange email addresses or phone
numbers if you want to see them again
Be honest – if you want to see them
again, say so. If not, thank them for a
nice time and say it was nice to meet them.
Accept a lift from your date until
you know them well enough
Complain all the time
Talk about past relationships,
apart from fleetingly
Insist – if they want to call you,
or get in touch, they will
Give out your home or work address
Have a great day and tune in on Friday for Mohanalakshmi Rajakumar's interview
I once flew from Heathrow to San Francisco for a blind date.
ReplyDeleteShe stood me up!
wow! That was a pretty expensive non-date!
DeleteI opened the door. He had a dozen roses. He told me God had sent him in search of a wife. He proposed over appetizers.
ReplyDeleteSecond date was at a bowling alley, I brought a 'boyfriend' and had the man with the plan from god pay for all three of us to bowl. No third date.
I am simply surprised there was a second date! Thx for sharing, Sooz
DeleteHaha! Once agreed to meet a 'friend of a friend' outside Selfridges. Got there early. Stood on opposite side of road. Didn't like the look of him. Left. 9I was 19 at the time).
ReplyDeleteOh no! Poor guy! I don't think I have ever been stood up, or ever stood anyone up. (racks brain). Nope, can't think of a situation.
DeleteI once met a woman from an internet dating site so it was kind of a blind date. In true safe mode, we met on neutral ground...an Italian cafe no less. In the hour or so we were together, I never said a word & just listened to her stories about a series of disastrous relationships. She seemed surprised when I said we wouldn't be meeting again & asked me why. I replied by saying that, if she could tell me my name, I'd explain! The experience persuaded me to write a short story about two people meeting on the internet but with a vastly different story line. Called Perfect Strangers, it's available from all good email accounts. It might not prove that men can multi task but it does show that a man can write in Mills & Boon style!!
ReplyDeleteGreat story and shows the importance of listening. It's particularly rude just to drone on and on about yourself, on a first date. Thanks for posting.
DeleteWorst pick up line I've heard: "People tell me I look like Tupac".
ReplyDeleteThis line fell flat with me because at the time I was living in Mexico and had no clue who Tupac was! Years later when I saw his picture I had to agree, that guy did look like Tupac.
as I already told you directly, had never heard of Tupac either. Had to Google him.
DeleteI haven't any funny tales to tell myself (my only experiences with internet dating were forgettable - walking into a pub, seeing HIM and thinking, noooo...), but my sister once met a guy through a dating agency who, after half an hour, said he had to leave because he wanted an early night - it was 8pm.
ReplyDeleteA friend of mine had a wonderful one - guy went to the loo and never came back!
About 20 years ago I went on a first date with someone who seemed great - during the meal I mentioned, in passing, my ex husband, and the guy's nostrils flared as he said "I don't want to hear about your ex boyfriends, or your ex husband, or anyone. You're with me now, okay?" I grabbed my bag and made a run for it....
At least he wasn't washing his hair! Yes and no one needs possessive, jealous psychos!
DeleteI once met a guy in a bar. Maybe I might have had a cocktail too many and maybe that made this guy way more charming than he was. So I gave him my phone number. My weirdo detector was going off in a big way when he called to set up the date. Always always listen to your weirdo detector ladies. It is always right.
ReplyDeleteMet him at a restaurant. Sat for a very uncomfortable meal, where the only thing going through my head was how can I leave and not hurt this guys feelings and he has a piece of food in the corner of his mouth that is making me want to vomit. BLAH!
So we left and I said I had an early morning. He tried to kiss me and I panicked and gave him my cheek. I was hoping that viscous thing in the corner of his mouth hadn't rubbed off.
I thought, early night, cheek kiss, being very evasive about another date, would be a big enough hint not to call.
I was so wrong. He called and called and I ducked his calls. He showed up at my work. At the time I was in university and working part time at a drug store. I didn't tell him which one I worked at. Then he would show up at school, when I was out with my friends and the final straw, one time when I was out for a walk. He didn't live in my neighborhood.
So three months later after telling him numerous times to leave me alone. To not call me. etc He comes once more to the bar I go to. By this time I won't go anywhere alone. He wants to know why I am so mean to him. I say because you are a weirdo and I don't like you. He says why can't we be friends. I say because friends should like each other and I don't like you. He says will you dance with me one last time"
I snapped. I freaking lost my mind. I should have went to a bouncer and got him kicked out, but now I was mad. I said "I loathe the ground you walked on, I hate to see your face it makes my physically ill. I don't want you to call me, follow me, talk to me, look at me, or think about me. I never met you, this has been one giant nightmare. If he you don't disappear from my life forever I will allow my male friends who have offered, begged even numerous times to beat the shit out of you."
He said I was mean and if I didn't want him around I should have just said so. That was my worst date by far.
I'm thinking....'restraining order!'
DeleteThanks for sending me this! I'm sooo behind on blog reads and this is so good. I had a blind-internet date once wherein the fellow asked, casually to him I guess, how long I could hold my breath. I finished up quick and hopped in a cab. Crrreeeeepy.
ReplyDelete